When in Wales, one of the must-check places – at least based on tourist recommendations – is this Anglesey town famous for its very long name:the Llanfairpwllgwyngyll, located across the Menai Strait, a short drive or train ride from Bangor.

How’s the place?

@outragemag Introducing #llanfairpwllgwnyngyllgogerychwyrn #llanfairpg, the town with the longest name in #Europe, as discovered during this #LGBT #Wales ♬ original sound – Outrage Magazine

Una, let’s get one thing out of the way: Don’t come here expecting to see or do much. People just come here to take pics of the town’s name… basically.

The name is the one, if not the only attraction.

As FYI: Even locals have a hard time pronouncing the name. We asked someone to do that for us. We were told, though, that there’s a shortened version, Llanfair PG… which isn’t a mouthful na.

Ikalawa, the name was popularized in the 19th century, mainly as a publicity stunt. The town, of course, supersedes this popularized name.

Ikatlo, the name is usually translated to: St. Mary’s Church in the hollow of the white hazel near a rapid whirlpool and the Church of St. Tysilio near the red cave.

The meaning actually revolves around local landmarks, including:

• St Mary’s church, 
• the “Swellies” (the pool/hollow of the whirlpool in the Menai Strait)
• St Tysilio’s church

Ika-apat, in truth, this isn’t the longest name for any place.  Even Bangkok’s ceremonial name is longer. Then there’s that town in New Zealand.

But this is commonly described as the longest one-word place name in Europe. 

So… since the name was crafted for tourism, exactly how many tourists come over? Roughly 200,000 a year. Doesn’t seem much, really, but considering the “offerings” of the place, marami na.

Besides, compared to the tourist numbers under the Marcos administration, marami na yan (!).

But off we go for more LGBTQIA+ rampa…

So… you arrive in Heathrow, the main airport in London, and – like many tourists – you need to head to the center of London for your accommodation. There are, of course, a number of transportation options, from grabbing a cab to taking the express train. 

There’s an option that isn’t always advertised: that is, for you to just take the “regular” train, the so-called Underground.

Special thanks to Ms Kayla Garcia for this tip, of course.

@outragemag New to #London and traveling from #Heathrow to the city center? No need to overspend via #taxi or #expresstrain; just take the #LGBT #Underground ♬ original sound – Outrage Magazine

Una, the underground is, as the name suggests, underground. From the arrival area, follow the signs leading to the “Underground”, which is around five minutes walk from where you’d exit after collecting your luggage.

Ikalawa, be careful: it’s basically on the same area as the Express trains, so if you erroneously entered their area, you’d be forced to spend more.

Ikatlo, yung bayad, nagbabago depending sa exact location you’re going to, and time, too. But naglalaro lang sa 6 pounds pababa… usually. Which is much cheaper than the Express trains by a lot. Add na lang to shopping ang natipid… unless anak ka ng politician na male-maletang pera ang dala mo while undergoing your tax-funded UK education…

And ika-apat, you may buy tickets from those machines at the entrance of the station. But this is London, cashless is usual. Pay using PayWave; tap mo lang credit or debit card mo, keri ka na.

Kung rich ka and money is not a problem… avail ka ng less local mode of transportation, kaya mo yan. But for those who believe commercialization of service sucks, and – in the case of transportation – bettering public transport makes better sense than shelling out cash to make rich people in the transportation industry even richer, then… here’s how many locals travel to and from Heathrow. Huwag na pretentious and avail na…

And off we go for more  LGBTQIA+ rampa…

Now and then we head outside of Metro Manila to check some of the culinary offerings of wherever we end up at. This is why we know that Silang in Cavite has a LOT to offer (even if it may be considered provincial, and even more than, say, Las Piñas that is part of Metro Manila). And this is why we know that Antipolo has 24-hour venues even if Quezon City or the City of Manila “sleeps”.

The intent to discover affordable yet not-bad steaks – in particular – was what led us to The Beef Deli – Malolos, which claims to offer meats “from Australia to your plate” in Bulacan.

@outragemag #LGBT checking #steakhouse The Beef Deli-Malolos in #Bulacan ♬ original sound – Outrage Magazine

Una, the place is easy to find naman… particularly for those with private vehicles. It is at the vicinity of the entrance to NLEX lang din, so you can access it if you’re getting off or about to enter the expressway (as we did).

Ikalawa, the venue was masikip, tight. Largely, this was because of not-ideal lay-out that seemed to prioritize being able to accommodate more customers than customer comfort. While there, expect ingay, too; you’re seated too closely to other customers you can eavesdrop.

Ikatlo (and I took this down in my notes, too), the service was REALLY slow. We had to remind the waiters to: set our table (we were seated for a while already), provide us with cutlery, and give us some water. It didn’t help that the two servers who approached us did not know what’s in their menu.

Ika-apat, the food was… hit and miss, with more misses than hits.

The Sweet & Beefy Spaghetti (₱650) was… more sweet, less beefy. Imagine Jollibee’s spaghetti, now make it even sweeter, and you’d get an idea of what was given to us. Particularly since there’s less beef here, and more sausage slices. The accompanying bread also tasted burnt, not grilled.

The Absolutely Meatzza Pizza (₱550) was not just not as meaty (considering its name), but was also too sweet, with a tinapay-like dough.

For the steak, we got the two-for-the-price-of-one Premium Ribeye (₱1,560), cooked MR. Here’s the thing: the steak was okay naman, as it seemed properly seasoned and properly grilled. But when served to us, it was already cold, like it waited in the kitchen. So natulog na ang mantika when served, and slight kadiri na in the mouth.

We didn’t finish the food, so we had them wrapped.

Now, to add drama: when we arrived home, we found that the steak we asked to wrap wasn’t in the take-home bag. I, personally, was annoyed; we didn’t exactly have a good experience there, and then… they didn’t even pack what we already paid.

I contacted the number of the company that’s listed online, and – this is a great part – I received a proper response. I was told that, after some tracing, the leftover food was found. I was also told that, without charging me, they will have the leftover delivered to us the next day.

Yes, after reheating the leftover steak, they had it delivered to us… without charging us (as if I should be thankful for that, LOL). And NOT that I was expecting anything else, but the meat was all they sent; overcooked (due to reheating) stale steak that we didn’t get to enjoy anymore because of The Beef Deli – Malolos. No apology for the bad experience via some kind of compensation like… a serving of French fries man lang.

The place is okay-appearing naman, TBH. But Bulacan has a lot of venues to check, so we’re giving this a hard pass for revisiting na muna. And so off we go in search of more lafangan venues…

The Beef Deli – Malolos is located at G/F Unit 7-10, Andan Enterprises, Inc, 3598 MacArthur Hwy, Malolos, 3000 Bulacan Province. For more information, contact 0905 283 8461 or email beefdelimalolos@gmail.com.